You know those moments, when you hear a song you’ve heard a dozen times, and all of a sudden it brings you to tears? And you just don’t know why it decided to hit you at THAT moment? THAT point in time? THAT second? Well, I had that moment this morning, and lucky for me, it was on the treadmill at the gym (which, let me tell you, is quite an embarrassing time and place to have THAT moment). But nonetheless, I was brought to tears this morning while on the treadmill at 6:06am. “Worlds Apart” by Jars of Clay was one of the first songs that came on my playlist during my run. Granted, I’ve heard this song many times and absolutely love it, but today was different. I didn’t let the lyrics just wash over me. God tuned my heart in to every word. When the bridge came, I was moved to tears to a point where I was crying on the treadmill. God is so good. In case you haven’t heard the bridge, these are the lyrics:
I look beyond the empty cross forgetting what my life has cost and wipe away the crimson stains and dull the nails that still remain More and more I need you now, I owe you more each passing hour the battle between grace and pride I gave up not so long ago So steal my heart and take the pain and wash the feet and cleanse my pride take the selfish, take the weak, and all the things I cannot hide take the beauty, take my tears the sin-soaked heart and make it yours take my world all apart take it now, take it now and serve the ones that I despise speak the words I can't deny watch the world I used to love fall to dust and thrown away take my world apart, take my world apart I pray, I pray, I pray take my world apart
I know, right? I don’t know about you, but these lyrics spoke an amazing word over me this morning. I felt God’s presence to an overwhelming and awesome degree. Many parts of this song stood out to me, so I thought I’d take a moment and share them with you.
“The battle between grace and pride, I gave up not so long ago.”
I believe this is a very difficult battle for many of us to give up. Pride is part of human nature, which leads us to, at times, slightly grow complacent in trying to “get rid” of it. I want to stop fighting for my pride and fight for humility. I pray for God to remove my pride daily, but how many times do we pray for things and actually want God to do them. With our entire hearts? Oh pride…
“Take the selfish, take the weak, and all the things I cannot hide. Take my beauty, take my tears, the sin-soaked heart and make it yours.”
I want this to be my sincere and pure prayer. I want God to take the selfish out of me. Even things that I want to hide. You can’t hide anything from God, which He continues to teach me every day. But do I really WANT God to take my hidden “things” in a way that I cannot hide them anymore? Pretty scary if you ask me. Hidden things are ours to do with what we want, right? Not so much. In Psalms 19, David prays for God to forgive his “hidden faults.” I pray for sincerity like this, a heart like this, that is NOT scared to reveal the hidden things, because God already knows! In Psalm 139, David asks God to “search” him and “know his anxious thoughts.” God knows it all, yet still wants us to willingly surrender and invite Him to take our world apart.
And just the entire concept of taking my world apart. Wow. Everything I know or hold on to or love or exalt, I want God to take those things apart if it means growing closer to Him, knowing Him more, feeling His presence more, glorifying Him more, and serving Him more. More of Him, less of me. Always.
Needless to say, I felt His presence this morning. And I enjoyed it. Even on the treadmill with people all around me J